Corona Diaries - 14

I’m always asked; why did I choose medicine? I didn’t actually. It was chosen for me yet somehow it turned out into the best decision of my life. I wanted to be a genetic engineer. I was fascinated with “Dolly the Sheep” for some reason. I wonder what happened to Dolly…

I loved mathematics and used to get full marks on all of my exams. I loved chemistry and had joined in competitions at Manchester University when I was still in high school. I used to love biology too and loved physiology, how things worked and how they were put together. On the other hand, I also loved English and English literature; I read poetry and Shakespeare for fun and not just as part of my schoolwork. I remember walking to the library at the end of the week to borrow 5 books, I would read them all during the week and then exchange them the next Friday. I used to do art and graphic design during my GCSE’s and wanted to paint and create sculptures. This is something I truly miss, I haven’t painted in a very long time; it used to give me so much pleasure. I was also learning to play the piano with a group of my friends. Those were the days: the days of “Whalley Range High School” back in Manchester.

We grew up in the UK because of my dad’s studying. We used to go back to Kuwait during summer breaks and sometimes during Christmas. It was time to apply for universities. I remember being in my aunt’s house in Kuwait and she had just put henna in my hair. We were watching a cartoon when my parents called. They ministry somehow worked out my high school percentage as 96.6% even though I had gotten 12 A*’s and A’s. I remember the exact conversation.

Dad: “Your percentage allows you to do Medicine.”

Hawra: “But I want to be a genetic engineer.”

Mom: “Let’s put medicine first and then genetic engineering as your second choice. Your percentage lets you do medicine, not many get the chance.”

Hawra: “Okay.”

It was as simple as that.

It was the 2-minute phone call that decided my future, and it was that simple. I got accepted based on my GCSE’s so I had the option of either doing a foundation year and then going into medical school or I could do my AS/A2 levels in Manchester and then I would apply to university by myself. I opted to go for A-levels. I liked doing things properly and that’s how my friends in the UK were applying. I finished my AS/A2 levels and “Manchester High School for Girls” as it was a private school, so I made new friends again. That’s the story of my life, changing schools every few years, adapting to new environments and making new sets of friends.

Two years later, I got accepted into medical school in Aberdeen and we moved yet again. I was hardworking so it didn’t matter what I studied; I always studied well. I was one of those geeks that goes to every single lecture and sits at the front. I would spend hours in the library studying. We were exposed to patients since our first year and I liked caring for them but I was still a student. It didn’t sink in that I would one day become a doctor, not yet anyway.

In my third year, I remember being attached to a junior doctor when he got called to see a sick patient and I tagged along. The patient was admitted with heart failure and we were called for shortness of breath. I remember the patient unable to lie down or breathe. His saturation had dropped to 83%. The doctor assessed and ordered for furosemide to be given. He sat him up and let me listen to the back of his chest. I heard a crackly noise and appreciated why they call them “crackles”. The patient looked like he was drowning and he was very uncomfortable; he was fighting for every breath.

“You always sit heart failure patients up first. That’s the first thing you do. Then you check their BP and give furosemide if the BP is acceptable. You can increase their oxygen during this time to make them more comfortable.”

The nurse came to give him his medication and we increased his oxygen to 5L. His saturation improved to 93%. We requested other tests like a chest x-ray and ECG. Within 15 minutes the patient was comfortable and could breath normally again. We reduced his oxygen and said we’ll come back to assess him soon.

“Furosemide is the magic drug. Remember that.”

That was the first time that I had seen how medications actually save lives. I had seen medicine in action. I had seen a man drowning and we had helped him breathe again. That was the moment I decided I really wanted to be a doctor. I wanted to help more people. I wanted to care for the sick. I wanted to do something meaningful with my life. I wanted to be the one to teach medical students, the way I was taught. I wanted to see the awe in their eyes when I would do something simple, like give furosemide.

How do they expect teenagers to make lifelong decision? How are we supposed to make a huge decision about our careers when we are 17? I wouldn’t have gone for medicine if my parents hadn’t pushed me. Fortunately, it was the best decision of my life and I ended up loving medicine. I can’t imagine doing anything else. I wouldn’t know what else to do.

Auld Lang Syne

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind? Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my jo, for auld lang syne, we'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet, for auld lang syne.

And surely ye'll be your pint-stoup! and surely I'll be mine! And we'll tak' a cup o’ kindness yet, for auld lang syne.

We twa hae run about the braes, and pou'd the gowans fine; But we've wander'd mony a weary fit, sin' auld lang syne.

We twa hae paidl'd in the burn, frae morning sun till dine; But seas between us braid hae roar'd sin' auld lang syne.

And there's a hand, my trusty fiere! and gie's a hand o' thine! And we'll tak' a right gude-willie waught, for auld lang syne.

- Robert Burns